Preparing Your Child to Return to Nursery or School

In many parts of the world, governments are starting to ease restrictions and many are preparing for children to return to nurseries and school.

If this is happening in your part of the world, as excited (or saddened) as you might be about the prospect of no longer spending 24/7 with your children, it's important to recognise that this is another transition period for your family.

Transitions can be tough on some children.  Some children handle them well, but for the majority, transitions can be another time of uncertainty and unknowns.  It can prompt anxiety or other complex feelings resulting in undesirable behaviour on the part of your child.

What can you do to support your child through this transition period?

- Talk to them.  Whether they are 2 or 10, it is important to continue to talk to them about what's going on (with filters you see as appropriate) and about the changes that are going to happen.  Continue to keep the lines of communication open and encourage your child to talk to you about their thoughts and feelings. Include topics such as

      - logistics (how exactly is their return going to work, any local requirements about distance, protocols, etc.),

      - friends (how might they feel when seeing their friends again after such a long time),

     - being back at school (that it will likely feel a little different, even if on the surface everything is the same),

      - interaction with adults (what are your local guidelines for this) etc. 

- Review their "new" skills.  This might include going over the routine and steps of handwashing and talking about queuing and maintaining distance with others.

- Discuss the wearing of face masks.  This discussion will vary depending on your local guidelines but the reality is that no matter where in the world you are, our children will be seeing more and more people wearing masks.  It can make people feel uneasy seeing others in masks (esp black ones!) and so talk about this, why people wear them, what they are for, how to wear them, etc.

- Discuss how others might behave.  This unprecedented situation has brought out a variety of different emotions and behaviours in everyone.  Now that our children are beginning to reintegrate into the wider social world, they will encounter others (whether children or adults) with different opinions, protocols and attitudes. 

They might notice others staying a clear distance from them (even their teachers if this is a local requirement).  The might hear comments and remarks from others which feel like personal attacks or just simply aren't very considerate.  Talk to them about how this might make them feel, how they could react and what they could do if these types of situations happen (e.g. come and talk to you about it!).

Practice Listening

This is a great opportunity for you to practice listening to your child.  Sometimes this can be hard to do when our own hearts and heads are full of our own stuff.  And your child may not open up to you at the most convenient moment or when you're having a discussion.  Often, their inner thoughts and concerns come out at what feels like the most random times. 

If this happens, try to just listen.  Really hear what they are saying and validate their perspective.  Now is not the time to dismiss their thoughts and opinions - if you do, they will be reluctant to open up to you again.

Mentally preparing yourself for some unexpected emotions and behaviours from your child during this upcoming period of transition will help you be in the right frame of mind to stay calm and be open when it happens.  And if it does happen, remind yourself that this is a new situation for everyone and you are on the same side as your child. 

Choose love and connection over chaos and conflict.