2 Summer Survival Strategies

It’s summertime!  Are you enjoying the unstructured time with your kids or is it all driving you a bit nutty already?

I know that summer can both be the generator of amazing childhood memories as well as the cause of much wine consumption (okay, or, back to parental behaviour: yelling, nagging and bribing). 

It’s a tough juxtaposition - on the one hand, we want to enjoy this precious time with our children and delight in them.  On the other hand, it can be really tough to juggle their flexible schedules with all the stuff we want to (and need to) get done.

I personally like having a clean and tidy house.  So that’s the thing that drives me a bit nutty - when the kids come in from the garden with grass stuck to their feet that gets strewn around the floor, or the non-stop food and drink consumption that inevitably spills.  And yes, my children (even the toddler) are all pretty good at keeping things tidy and cleaning up after themselves but somehow summer just generates more mess and dirt!

The other day I was getting slightly wound up by the relentlessness of it all and I reminded myself of two strategies that instantly helped (honestly!):

1. Don’t sweat the small stuff. 

I know, it’s simple and cliché.  But, especially during summer, I find it’s a pragmatic approach that helps me stay calm and enjoy my kids more. 

There are some things that I just decide to “let go” of during the summer (like making my kids shower every day!).  The things I decide to turn a blind eye to might change depending on the day and situation, but the result is that I nag my kids less and enjoy them more. 

It doesn’t mean that the stuff I let go of doesn’t matter - it just means I’m chasing not to focus on that stuff right now. 

And trust me, if things get out of hand in any one area, we will be chatting about it at our weekly family meeting - so I know things won’t get too out of hand!  I also know when summer is over and our lives get a bit more structured again, we’ll be reinforcing all our “rules” again!

2.  It’s critical to have “sanity” time.

You could call this “me” time or “self-care”. 

What it looks like is different for everyone, but the idea is that you need to find regular time to replenish yourself and be without children. 

It could be daily, every other day, or weekly.  The frequency depends on you.  (And no, in my book, work time doesn’t count.)

It could be 5 minutes to sit and have a quiet cup of tea in the room next to where your children are playing, or an hour’s exercise or an evening out with girlfriends. 

Whatever it is that replenishes you and reminds you that YOU still exist beyond your identity as a parent.

For me, my ideal summer “sanity time” would be an hour’s hike/run in the mountains where we live - combining exercise with fresh air and some time to think. 

I wouldn’t mind an hour to get into a good book either, but I personally find that tougher to achieve while the kids are awake.  I know some mums who love reading implement a “reading hour” after lunch - where everyone has quiet time and sits down to read, even little ones can look at their picture books.  This is a fantastic way not only to model the love of reading to your kids but to get in your sanity time if childcare is not an option.

So, if you find yourself getting slightly wound up or impatient, or hear yourself nagging or criticising your children, take a moment to reflect on what you might do to change the situation.  And perhaps give one or both of the above strategies a try and see if they help at all. 

Remember, what you focus on grows.

So if you focus on the positive things your kids say/do, you will notice more of that.  It’s brain science and proven.

Conversely, if you focus on all the negative stuff, guess what - you notice that more. 

So which will you choose this summer?

Reader Bonus:  Grab your copy of 20 Summer Activity Ideas & Kids Routine Checklist to ensure you never have to think about what to do and that your kids know what they have to do!  See below for details.